Stalking For Love is a popular media trope where invasive stalker-like behavior is presented as an endearing or harmless part of romantic courtship. The hero will often go to extraordinary lengths to coerce, trick or otherwise manipulate his way into a woman’s life.
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• Are Hollywood movies teaching men and boys that predatory behavior is OK?
• Stalking, actually: Why men who reject rejection are not romantic heroes
• How Bollywood Plays a Role in Normalising Stalking
• Study finds romcoms teach filmgoers to tolerate ‘stalking myths’
• Study: I Did It Because I Never Stopped Loving You
• How Rom-Coms Undermine WomenRECOMMENDED BOOKS
• All About Love: New Visions by bell hooks
• The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love by bell hooks
Tag: reference
in therapy my therapist and i were talking about my own feelings of self worth in relationships. and she asked me to say qualities about myself that someone else would be attracted to, on a romantic and platonic level. so i named some things like compassionate, empathetic, etc. and she said “you named things that you can give someone. ways you can serve, rather than ways that you are” and y’all..my mind was blown that’s gonna stick with me forever like she then proceed to tell me actual innate qualities about myself that she liked and thought anyone else would like as well and i hadn’t even considered those because like she said i was focused on things i could do outwardly to attract and maintain connections rather than who i was as a person..goddamn!!! thats tea!!!
With this in mind, this also makes me think of the ways people describe us. When people say the reasons that they love/like you or describe you as a person, are they only naming ways that you serve them? Are they equating your worth with how much you do for them?
ex. “You’re such a good listener. You’re so generous, you’re so compassionate. You’re always there for me. You always hold me down. You’re reliable”
vs.
“You’re so funny! You’re very vibrant. You’re creative, passionate, and intelligent. You’re optimistic. You’re so talented at ____” , etc. I think that’s very telling.

noon:
Ray Frenden reviews the too-cheap-to-be-true Monoprice graphics tablets. How do they stack up to industry standard Wacoms?
After spending a week with the 6.25“x10” Monoprice, my Yiynova and Cintiq remain unplugged and I gave my Intuos away to a friend. The Monoprice tracks subtle pressure variances and small movements with less lag and more crisp fidelity than any of the others. It is, put crudely, fucking awesome, in both OSX Lion and Windows 7 x64.
I have one of these, 10×6.5 I bought about two months ago for 48 bucks. It’s a billion times better than my old Wacom Bamboo and works like a fuckin dream.
ATTENTION ALL PENNY-PINCHING ART FRIENDS!!!
ooo reblogging this for potential future purchase
oh
I’m definitely thinking of getting one of these, or asking for one for Christmas. ‘Cause as much as I appreciate Ian giving me his old tablet, I think the pen might be on it’s last legs. ;~;
Oh my god these start at $25 for a little one.
I would be so okay with a little one.
Reblogging this again because I fucking lost it and don’t want to forget it again.
Relevant to some friends’ interests… vaultedthewall , trows …
i got mine for $75 including shipping to australia and i’ve been using it since 2012 and it still works well today, definitely recommend
reblogging so i can find this if i ever think of buying a new one
WTF IS THAT HOW YOU DO IT! MUM COME LOOK AT THIS
this video changed my life
19-year-old Japanese fashion students Akki and Hana on the street in Tokyo wearing items from Hood by Air, MYOB NYC, A Cold Wall, Some Ware x GHE20G0TH1K, 032C, Vans, and Yosuke. Full Looks
So this is about studying, but it can be applied to any kind of creative, educational, or work endeavor.
My college classes are full college classes, but they’re compressed into 8 weeks. So for the next 8 weeks I will be working full time, going to school, doing this massive volunteer project, and managing 5-6 kids’ activities. To say that I’m anxious about it is an understatement. When I’m anxious about something, what do I do? Research! Here’s what I’ve found out:
- Multitasking is a myth, at least for adults. Single tasking is the way to go. OK.
- From personal experience, that ‘use those small pockets of 15 minutes to do a small slice of ‘x’ activity is generally unhelpful. I have several pockets of 15 minutes but it feels completely chaotic to constantly switch activities.
- We have limited capacity for what our brains can handle. They need sleep. They need rest during the day too, apparently. (Here’s another.) So I purposely schedule in break time between tasks to veg, or meditate, or walk.
- But what to do when I’m on task and being productive? As a fan of the Pomodoro method for keeping on track – 25 5 25 5 25 5 25 15 – I have found (through experience and research) that this might be great for cleaning the house, but it’s actually awful for anything that requires actual concentration. Why?
- The research around attention says that takes office workers around 25 minutes to get back on track after an interruption. And I’m going and interrupting myself! It’s basically setting up my brain for self-sabotage.
- The research around deep work and flow states (x x etc), on the other hand, essentially tell us that long blocks of uninterrupted time, hyper focus, when we are at our best are ideal for big projects.
How am I applying this to my schoolwork, my writing goals, etc?
First, I’m writing everything down. And then I’m diving them into what I think will be 2-3 hour chunks of time. For school, I’m taking two classes this 8 weeks, which translates to two chapters per class per week. On weeks when I have a test, it’s just one chapter each. That’s four deep work sessions of schoolwork.
- First of all, I wrote down everything I needed to do.
- Then I did a small visualization exercise. This sounds hokey, but reaffirming why you’re doing what you’re doing really helps.
- Distraction management: ate a snack, refilled my water bottle, went to the restroom, hid my phone, etc.
- Prepared my workspace. Designate a workspace. It’s important
And then I got to work. For each session I was tackling one half of my schoolwork for that class for the week:
- Peruse the chapter.
- Read the lecture notes.
- Listen to the lecture -take supplemental notes.
- Read the chapter – fill in notes on your powerpoint printouts.
- Retype the combined notes.
- Do the end of chapter questions.
- 4 discussion board posts.
- Take the quiz.
- Analyze and print out the quiz results.
- Prepare notecards.
The first session took me about three and a half hours, and it was absolutely brutal. BUT it would have taken me 5-6 otherwise.
I gave my brain a 30-45 minute break, ate, took a bathroom break, phone break, etc.
Repeat session: MUCH faster.. 2 – 2.5 hours for the same amount of work.
Repeat break: dinner, rest, music.
Repeat with the first session for math class: 1.5 hours.
This – longer work sessions – is nothing revolutionary, but it does run counter to what we’re told a lot of the time. I finished what would have been 12-15 hours of distracted, miserable work in an afternoon/evening. I feel really good about the quality of that work, and I feel so prepared for this week.
I have also been doing this at work – closing my inbox, turning off Skype and my phone – and it has yielded amazing results there, too. I already do this with painting. I think I’m going to do 1-2 deep writing sessions a week instead of trying to squeeze in a little big every day. I’ll adjust and test different variables over the next 8 weeks (shorter breaks, different times of day, etc), but I was super excited and wanted to share.
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-Eve
Hey guys!! I’m in this podcast. If you want to listen to me play Dungeons and Dragons and crack wise you should check it out.
yr girl had to totally learn the choreography of hayley kiyoko’s curious. i realized i made a few mistakes after filming this but whatever haha ✨💞



















