inspiration – Page 3 – take time to figure it out

melodioussuggestions:

a-myriad-of-obsessions:

melodioussuggestions:

speak nicely to yourself! it makes a world of difference.

ok but how

any time you get a negative thought about yourself, cut it off completely and, if you can, contradict it. for example, if i start to think “i’m so ugly”, i should try to cut it off and say something like “no i’m not, beauty is subjective, i’m beautiful if i say i’m beautiful”. it sounds very corny, but it works.

if you can’t say something nice about yourself (and i totally get not being able to do that bc the bad thoughts are just too loud), change the subject of your thoughts to something positive. so, using the above example, if i start to think “i’m so ugly”, i could just cut the thought off and say “no. it’s so sunny and nice outside today!” or “no. that dog on the sidewalk is cute!” or “no. i don’t have homework today!” or any number of other positive things.

i often have to cut the bad thought off with a firm, decisive “no”. you have to make a decision to be kind to yourself and stick to it.

DO NOT make self-deprecating jokes. you might say “but it’s a joke!” and while that’s true, it does mess up your self-esteem if you do it regularly. it has happened to me and i am still recovering. please, even when kidding, don’t put yourself down, bc if you hear it enough, you’ll start to believe it. (i’m so serious about not doing this bc it’s a really sneaky method of ruining your self-esteem, and people often don’t realize it has a negative impact on them when they do it.)

to supplement all the things you can do for yourself, also make sure you’re surrounding yourself with people who love you and encourage you to treat yourself kindly. friendly teasing is fine (i do it to my friends often), but make sure your friends are receptive to you and what you need at any given moment, and that they’re aware of the line between friendly teasing and being mean.