one-piece-of-harry:

The real reason it’s a fucking travesty Peter Parker is “straight” is that he would have a fucking field day making gay jokes. Imagine Spiderman wit mixed with millennial gay humour. He’d be unstoppable

tinaruthbelcher:

thelowlysatsuma:

izzy-almighty:

hot take: jake peralta is bi and john mulaney plays his ex boyfriend from high school in season six of brooklyn nine-nine

hotter take: john mulaney is playing himself. that’s it. Jake peralta’s high school ex-boyfriend IS JOHN MULANEY

hottest take: it was college & Jake was the rocking twink

andalites:

marionette-raconteur:

andalites:

Learned my parents had perished in a terrible fire at Claire’s

(Perished means killed)

So were you at Claire’s when you heard the news, or did they die at Claire’s?

chaoticlesbian:

Lemonade with no alcohol in it? I think you mean Mike’s Flaccid

snoopingasusualisee:

thexfiles:

king princess is timothehe chalumet for lesbians 

cephalotodd:

mary bennett is a heterophobic lesbian she always plays the most awful undancable music at parties in an attempt to kill any possible mood between the straight couples. unfortunately her sisters make her play party music so they can dance with boys, which is a homophobic hate crime

olive2004:

today i read:

immaterial girls: for a digital beauty brand, cosmetics live not on you, but with you in images (about glossier)

‘corporations are people’ is built on an incredible 19th-century lie