
Magneto: Are you interested in joining my team of mutants fighting for the end of mutant oppression? 🙂
A mutant: sure what’s it called?
Magneto: the brotherhood of evil mutants
Mutant: w
Mutant: why’s it called that
like you all wouldnt be hyped as fuck to join a gay rights club called the “brotherhood of evil gays”
hey remember in 2016 when clown attack panic was a thing? and 2 years later it’s managed to leave no lasting indent in the American psyche, how does that work
They were preparing us for the biggest clown of all
The moon signs based on people I’ve met
Aries moon: HILARIOUS. really impulsive, all the aries moons ik struggle with substance abuse. So loving, childlike soul and it’s honestly so attractive. Temper issues. PS. Not everything revolves around you
Taurus moon: The best friend to enjoy food with because they’ll never judge your personal habits lmao. quite stylish and they always try to look good no matter what the occasion. Can be selfish and judgy at times. They love to hold grudges. Obsessed w/ sex
Gemini moon: SMART ASSES and it’s so cute. sometimes they act like they know more than they do but they’re still very quick thinkers and they have lots of information on various topics, like hey thanks for that absolutely random fact?? nervous and easily overwhelmed/stressed out
Cancer moon: The most thoughtful and loyal people ever. They’re really shy, introverted af and they loooove food, usually awesome home makers!! (@ my mom). Always trying to mother people and help the needy. Insecurity and moodiness are natural traits here. Either really close with their mom or not close at all.
Leo moon: y’all are so fun to be around and adventure with but MY GOD you guys gotta stop wallowing in self pity all the damn time it’s really unattractive and it gets old. Anyways you have really nice hair and you’re funny as fuck. Your emotions fill the room (which can be good and bad)
Virgo moon: this is my moon sign and I’ve only met 2 other people with this placement. Anxiety and nervousness are high. You can be too hard on yourself and you only focus on your negative traits which seems to make them stand out more. Smart from a young age, great chefs, so helpful and always have the best advice. May appear judgy but actualy the most understanding
Libra moon: they crave human interaction and close relationships. Sweetest human beings and they’re SO full of love for other people. self esteem issues usually root from childhood. Can be flaky and emotions are usually oppressed or all over the place. not very trustworthy depending on your relation with them. They love to gossip lmao
Scorpio moon: LOYAL AF. Kinky but can be really insecure or anxious when it comes to actual sex. You guys love to help other people with their problems but when it comes to your own issues/feelings you shut down. Great listeners and very trusting
Sagittarius moon: The sexiest moon sign imo. Your presence is uplifting and you’re so open minded and accepting of everyone. You put on a great show but it’s so hard to actually get to know you. So damn flighty and unloyal, I wish you’d stay a little longer
Capricorn moon: Dry sense of humour, Stubborn and hardheaded but it’s soooo hot. Are you ever NOT sarcastic???? Y’all are so self conscious you really gotta stop beating yourself up because so many people admire you. Some of the most generous people ik are cap moons!
Aquarius moon: You have the rep of being an unemotional alien but you’re actually the most needy people I know??? Emotions are all over the place and you can be kind of narcissistic. You are unique and you have a wide variation of interests. Usually very talented. Old souls
Pisces moons: Gentle and SO kindhearted. There can be dissociative tendencies and sometimes you’re really self destructive. May seem disinterested and and shut down most of the time but they’re not. They care so much more than you know. Substance abuse
Please don’t take any of these personal! These are only people I’ve met and you must understand there are many other factors that make up who they are. x
Hey guys, welcome to my unboxing video *rips Walt Disney out of the cryostasis containment unit*
sherlock holmes
watson: what is it holmes
holmes: *touches the corpse and puts his finger in his mouth* this man is dead
watson: i wish you loved me
holmes: what was that? i was just telling detective inspector lestrade a thinly veiled metaphor for how you are my one great romance, the likes of which will never be witnessed again, and i am irreparably changed for having met you despite knowing now you could never love me back
watson: nothing
holmes: oh ok *goes back to licking the crime scene*
Male writers really think they’re being clever when they have their female characters be the ones saying deeply misogynistic shit about themselves smh
bruce: and if i have to die, i want it to be on the electric chair
tony: if you ever for some reason end up on death row brucie ill bail you out
bruce: i was talking about thor’s lap but thanks tony!
tony: w
tony: what did you jus








