in recent years, there’s been an increasingly vitriolic push-back out of the queer community against the idea of butch women being open in their desire, especially if their desire is fem women. the gender non-conformity of butches here is used to project an essentially male status onto them in relationship to other women. therefore, their sexual desire for women – their “butch gaze” – is equal in its exploitativeness and objectification of the male. or so goes the logic.
but so much of my perception of self, as a lesbian and a fem, lies in the butch gaze. how can anyone think it even vaguely resembles the invasiveness and entitlement in the way men stare at women – the way that men have stared at me? the butch gaze is something completely different. it is the gaze of blatant lesbian desire, a powerful and empowering expression of women who want other women. I find strength in being stared at and desired by other women, especially – explicitly – by the women I desire most. in this homophobic world that furiously demands all women be for the consumption of men, it is an act of resistance to be unapologetic about the fact we want to fuck each other, and only each other. I never feel more womanly, more sensual, more beautiful or more lesbian than when I am openly desired by a butch woman. the butch gaze makes me dizzyingly aware of my own returned desire for her, her presence and unabashed lust reminding me that yes, I can want other women too. yes, it is okay. it is more than okay, it is beautiful. it is fulfilling. and yes, it is hotter than hell. the erotic charge of our dynamic is blatant. the world does not condone the sexual autonomy of women – most especially when it excludes men. the butch gaze is an autonomous and resistant manifestation of female sexuality – embodied by women who both refuse to be desirable to men, and who do not themselves desire men – that is entirely outside of the heteropatriarchy and maleness. the butch gaze is a powerful, transformative act that both affirms women beyond the objectification of male fantasy, and the sexual, erotic desire of lesbian women. the butch gaze is exciting and arousing and necessary to me as a lesbian fem. the butch gaze uplifts and admires. the butch gaze invites. the butch gaze liberates.
1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?
2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?
3. The person you would never want to meet?
4. What is your favorite word?
5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be?
6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?
7. What shirt are you wearing?
8. What do you label yourself as?
9. Bright room or dark room?
10. What were you doing at midnight last night?
11. Favorite age you’ve been so far?
12. Who told you they loved you last?
13. Your worst enemy?
14. What is your current desktop picture?
15. Do you like someone?
16. The last song you listened to?
17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?
18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?
19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do?
20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional)
21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do?
22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it?
23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of?
24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal.
25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it?
26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go?
27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be?
28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?
29. What is your favorite expletive?
30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno?
31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?
32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world!
33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?
34. What was your last dream about?
35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]?
36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?
37. Have you ever built a snowman?
38. What is the color of your socks?
39. What type of music do you like?
40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?
41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor?
42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer)
43. Do you have any scars?
44. What do you want to be when you graduate?
45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
46. Are you reliable?
47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?
48. Do you hold grudges?
49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create?
50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had?
51. Are you a good liar?
52. How long could you go without talking?
53. What has been you worst haircut/style?
54. Have you ever baked your own cake?
55. Can you do any accents other than your own?
56. What do you like on your toast?
57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of?
58. What would be you dream car?
59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain.
60. Do you believe in aliens?
61. Do you often read your horoscope?
62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet?
63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons?
64. What do you think about babies?
65. Freebie! Ask anything interesting you can think of.
sherlock holmes, black autistic nonbinary lesbian, has decided to bring justice to the people. i love her. she’s my hero.
she has committed to bringing justice to the people. i like that better. okay other stuff about my hero sherlock holmes:
-self-educated bc of the hostility in the higher education system toward ppl like her, “an omnivorous reader with a strangely retentive memory for trifles” she is CONSTANTLY fucking reading
-talented musician, with “a remarkable talent for composition”
-raised by her high-minded single mother (i think sherlock’s mom gets into respectability politics and is maybe not very demonstrative but she and sherlock have a huge amount of respect for each other, even if she wishes sherlock would take out her septum piercing)(i think sherlock’s mom is going to be like the mycroft figure from the canon stories since my mycroft is a pompous, useless white boy)
-fell out with victor trevor shortly before leaving her university, bc he wouldn’t take “i’m a lesbian” for an answer 😦
-deliberately cultivates unflappability, because it’s useful in her work but gets frustrated by the public perception that she’s emotionless
-doesn’t trust the fucking police
-a certain quiet primness of dress (GOD!!!!!) (think tailored suits and subtle pattern mixing)
-the dressing gowns!!!!
-sherlock is a science butch, but she also loves literature and poetry and music
-i don’t think that girl even knows what a bra is
-she wears a lot of ties tho (when she’s not in the lab), and i’ve heard she has a considerable number of cravats
-VERY romantic with john and loves spoiling her
-so the thing about john is that sherlock is very public spirited, and most of her adult life has been about making the world a better place (even a considerable amount of her adolescence). she meets john and. she has this grumpy little person who needs her help right in the flat. they wake up parts of each other they didn’t even know were sleeping. like someone accidentally brushes your bare skin and god. how long has it been since someone touched you on purpose? they both want to heal and mend the world, and then suddenly, there’s this delightful, fascinating, good, noble, damaged person right in orbit. the caretaker instinct flares up in both of them, and as they get to know each other, they start to see how beautifully they fit together in so many other ways.
take time to figure it out 